curbdrop out of grace

and now i'm glad it doesn't

sometimes i snore and sometimes i grind my teeth and sometimes i wake up really happy. sometimes is not all times but all times i am. until i cease to exist in some freak accident of murder/suicide.

listening to the reindeer section. the orchestration of melodies twist tightly around euphoria and extend to the heart. if i lost the ability to hear, i would lose the ability to love. and without love, i am no better than a zombie.

kristyn and jen harv are in town. i cannot keep track whether jen harv is jen #1 or jen #2. i believe #1.

my personal favorite trait about katie-slut is that she always into having sex. not a suprise with her in hindsight. my eyes are so bad, that my hindsight ain't 20/20. but she was very touchy feely and i am very touchy feely and that led to a lot of sex. sex isn't at all the most important thing in a relationship, but if there's little or no sex, i might as well be hanging out with my dad.

i love listening to music with headphones on and hearing these layers of recording that are skipped when sound is forced to travel through space and time, oxygen and carbon, translations transmitted poorly and you don't get the masterpiece. just a cheap imitation, warhol style.

was looking at phone numbers in my cell the other nite. it's funny that i do this exercise pretty frequently, deleting out rift raft. i have no problem with deleting numbers that others are afraid to. and quote "i like keep certain people's numbers in my phone so i can screen my calls and not answer if they call." well fuck that shit you should just fucking tell them not to bother you anymore. fear of this kind is pussy-fear.

but there are certain people i keep in my phone just in case i am super bored one day and want to be able to "catch up" and talk about what has changed in the past 3 years.

"cause when i take i take it pretty hard. and when you broke my heart you broke it into shards, of glass." this is a quote from "your sweet voice" by the reindeer section. this song is so beautiful that i could cry and not be labeled a faggot. this song is about lost love and break ups and wanting to still get back to some capacity with someone. rach said this the other nite and i agree that once you love someone, you don't really ever lose it. it just changes to something different. you might even hate someone deeply but at the end there's still something. i think so much of hate is twisted love. think prasad style. how many girls does the kid hate from back in the day because his bitter ass got rejected by bimbos. set them on fire. set the whole fucking planet on fire.

i need to install my new dell cd/dvd player/burner now. i also need to eat something, maybe country fried steak again?

when are we going to the blues bar again? maybe soon maybe tonite maybe that's what we'll drag people to? not the same without squirrel vomitting on the bar walls though.

posted by fillshe @ 2:47 PM