curbdrop out of grace

the fucking brits

oh, so i was just talking to motoko online and it made me want to write somemore.

i told her how much the weather sucks and how i just want to go to bed but wake up and not have to go outside, not because i'm depressed or fearful of the world, but because it's colder than an eskimo's pussy.

so then she's like, "well it's almost x-mas", infering that the fact i'll recieve shitty presents from my dysfuntional family will cheer up the spirit that is inside of me. my spirit is no casper the friendly ghost. he was under homo-suspicision by the way.

and who would read a stupid comic book about a friendly ghost? he wasn't even how like patrick swayze (hahah i just had to google that shit to get the correct spelling). and speaking of patricks, what happened to patrick duffy?

step by step day by day my two dads.

so last year my dad had a great idea of one-stop shopping for my brother and my x-mas presents. too bad he didn't go to a cool store like the las vegas bunny ranch. instead he went to an Ace or Aco and bought shit to clean up my car.

(for those of you who have had the misfortune of sitting in my car before, you will realize i do not take action in cleaning it.. there are numerous pop cans that would make a bum shit his pants and then eat it because he's starving/crazy/homeless/likes eating poop).

so what the fuck am i going to use turtle wax for. i swear the next girlfriend i have is going to get that as an anniversary present.

although knowing my bitch-ass, it'll end up being the fake present before i give out the real tiffany's.

anyway, the point of this blog is supposed to be the fact that mo told me to look forward to x-mas. however, i told her that this will be the first time in 4 years or so that i haven't had a girlfriend over x-mas. how cool is that. not that i need a girlfriend (i do because i'm not a real man), but it's just a wierd feeling, like trying to walk around with gum on the soles of your shoes.

i miss having a girlfriend but what i don't miss is having a boyfriend. how fucking deep is that comment?

if i had to date a guy, i think it would have to be hugh hefner. i mean, at least i know there's all these "pretty" sluts around all the time and i'm sure the girl to guy ratio would be like 6 to 3. also, for those non-asian-mathmatically-challenged folk, that means the fake boobies to errect penis ration is something like 11.5 to 2 (hugh wouldn't count as he's on cialis... "if you suffer from an errection lasting 4 hours, seek immediate medical attention").

and speaking of immediate, i'm going to sleep with the hopes that i immediately fall asleep. however that will probably not happen and i'll have to think about kool kate for three-units of time and m........

catholics unite.

posted by fillshe @ 1:00 AM